Tag Archive | truth

Audience of One

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As a personal self, I am very invested in the success of my words as they show up in the world.  This over-investment in outcomes weighs so heavily on me sometimes my pen becomes too heavy to lift to the paper.  This is when my fear wins and the words stay cloaked inside me and they do no good for anyone.

First things first, I have to honor my personal self’s investment in her writing success.  She was taught over and over in endless ways that what she does is more valuable than who she is.

I have to forgive her for that and then push her forward.  She has to push through rejection, countless unpaid projects and often deafening silence that greets her soul-baring essays.

There is a lot of noise in resistance.

Once I have pushed her through all of that we come to a place of purity where the words flow and heal the writer.

I do not know if she will ever let go of succeeding, but I never want that to impede the true purpose of her writing….

to heal herself.

If we only meet ourselves in the world, then any healing she finds in herself will lead all of us together further down the path of our Great Awakening.

The Blue Sky

The small girl shaded her eyes with her hand as she looked up at the expanse of the sky overhead.  It never ceased to amaze her.

This sky was so beautiful.

It was so blue.

Blue was her favorite color.

In the sky her soul could soar.  It could be as big as it needed to be.  She was without limits.

Finally, something matched how she felt on the inside.  It was a relief to find something in the world that mirrored a little of how she felt.  Nothing else did.

Eventually, as a self in the world tends to do, she learned about science and realized the sky was every color except blue.

from How Do We See Color? pantone.com:

Newton observed that color is not inherent in objects. Rather, the surface of an object reflects some colors and absorbs all the others. We perceive only the reflected colors.

Thus, red is not “in” an apple. The surface of the apple is reflecting the wavelengths we see as red and absorbing all the rest.

 

How could the sky not be blue?

It was as if everything she believed was no longer real.

Because it wasn’t.

As she grew into womanhood, the same thing happened to her when she began to understand the world around her was everything she thought it was not.

She thought it was real.

It is not.

Things that are real are immovable, unchanging and eternal.

Nothing in the world falls into these categories.

Everything we see and experience shifts and changes.

Who were you ten years ago?

Where did that person go?

Since we no longer are those people, does that mean they never existed?

Maybe what is real can only be found in the present moment.

Blink and that is over too.

Until we know for ourselves what is real and what is not, let us not forget to gaze upon the things that we love and pray they lead us home.

 

 

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This Mind’s Truth

Do you ever wonder why sitting in stillness is so hard?

This is where Truth lives.

Not the temporary kind you apply to life in an attempt to connect its fragmented logic, but rather, this is the Truth that transcends life.

I have accepted this Truth as a part of my experience.  It was sheer terror opening my mind to it because within its parameters, I ceased to exist.  Yet in the absence of my existence, I somehow observed the Truth.  It cannot be articulated.  It can only be experienced.

While I am more accepting that this mind opened a doorway to Truth, as a personal self, it is a very challenging awareness to play out on the stage of humanity.

I am somewhere in the middle.  I do not fully identify as a personal self anymore, however, it is the only identity in which I can relate.

It may be why strangers share their souls with me.  On some level, they know that I understand there is more to us than what meets the eye.

Once I started to accept that Divinity lived in my awareness, I began to panic.  If I knew the Truth, I had to share the Truth.

Slowly, over time, I have come to know that what I do will not impact the outcome of Truth.

Truth will come to each of us in its own way, in its own time.

I do not have to change anyone’s personal perspective, not even my own.

spiritual Writes March 25

 

 

What We Carry

Through my entire existence, I have been labeled by others and self-identified as sensitive.  I did not know I could change the oft unflattering connotations that this label has held for me.  I have carried the burden of being so completely outside the norm that it broke me.  It broke me hard.

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Eventually, I realized that it does not matter if I am or am not sensitive.  I am dropping this story as much as I can in as many ways possible. So what if I am?  So what if you are?  Let us look instead at where these false assumptions about ourselves lead us.  If we stay stuck in the personal, if we stay married to the labels, then we miss the entire point.

Every single one of us is somehow ‘not enough’ or ‘too much’ or ‘too this’ or ‘too that’.  If you want to spend your days in judgment determining what are acceptable levels of these traits in yourself and others, then this is your right.  Maybe sometimes a little good will come from these judgments. In my experience, this is rarely the case.  I believe labels and our judgments about them keep us looking outward where no solace can be found.

If you want to keep focusing outward, I hope you are able to at least consider the crosses you bear only hurt because you carry them.  

Lay them down.

 

 

 

What If?

What if the harder you try to find Truth, the more elusive it becomes?

What if knowing the answers meant letting go of finding them?

What if peace comes when the self’s expression of pain and fear is simply allowed?

What if all you have been searching for was right here, right now, not even a breath away?

What if you could accept that everything was perfect, unfolding as a great story of time and space, even when it hurt and was inexplicable in its complexities?

What if Love is all there is?

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Soul Gardens

Each of us is given a small soul garden.  Our purpose is to nurture this parcel of emotional real-estate.  This is how its beauty is preserved and our spiritual wisdom grows.  This system works perfectly when we tend to only our garden and remember that the sun above is always there, loving us through triumph and tragedy.  When we forget about the sun, hardship ensues.  We feel lost and afraid so what do we do?  We start trying to tend to gardens other than the one right in front of us.  When this happens, we quickly pay a price.  Our little garden loses its luster and begins to wilt at the first signs of neglect.  The gardens beyond us in which we meddle and manipulate, begin to crumble away at the indignity.  If this continues, all the gardens of the world start to suffer.

The best we can do is remember the sun in all circumstances and continually remind ourselves to tend only to the soul garden we were given.

This is how love blooms.

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The Water Underneath

In difficult relationships or situations, the trick of the tiny self is to analyze to the point of exhaustion.  Somehow, we falsely believe, if we could figure things out it will magically improve everything.  You might try new angles, new avenues and search for answers by asking someone you trust.  Maybe, just maybe, if we try a little bit more, a peaceful resolution will settle over us and we will ride off into the sunset happy with ourselves and the world.

It’s not true.

The only truth is to observe what hurts you the most and let it be.

This doesn’t mean you won’t eventually be inspired to act, but it stops you from looking outside yourself for the answers.

Let the frustration be.

Let the situation touch all your trigger points in your heart.

Let the person who befuddles you continue on their path.

Let it all unfold.

In my experience, once our analytical minds pause, the pain we have hidden from ourselves arises.

We have been taught pain is unacceptable.

It’s not true.

Pain is as welcome in our awareness as any other feeling, thought or emotion.

Pain just is.

Stop trying to change it, or diminish it.

Let it be.

Let it unfold.

 

“Our lives are like icebergs; most people pay attention just to the part above water, but what is really going on happens underneath the water level of everyday awareness.”

-Mary O’Malley

What’s in the Way Is the Way