Archive | October 2018

Could BE

We are told life should be a certain way.  If it strays from this expectation we judge it as ‘bad’ or ‘wrong’.

No one teaches us how to live the life we have been given.  We must learn that for ourselves even if there are things about it that we do not like.  Even if there are things about ourselves we do not like.

We suffer because life is not what we want.  We suffer because we are not what we think we should be.

This suffering layers upon itself and spirals us down the rabbit hole of despair.

First, to begin our healing, we have to recognize our unhappiness.  We have to find the thoughts within our minds that support that life is not as it should be.

This takes time.

This takes courage.

It is hard but you do not have to do anything more than that.  Make space for your judgments against life and yourself.

Given the framework we live in, it would make sense you would have these thoughts of ‘not enough’ or ‘less than’.

How does it feel to watch your judgments and not fight them?

For me, it feels easier.  The suffering these thoughts cause still remains but the resistance to them is diminished.

When we stop fighting what is, what will happen?

This could be the first step towards Love.  This could be the first step towards healing.

This could be the beginning of everything.

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A Beginning

Where is your heart today?

Is it outside of you?  Is it walking around in the shape of another person?  In the circumstances of the world’s fate?

In our search to right our discontent, we scan the horizon for answers.

I am hurting.  Who or what is causing this hurt?

Is it something I saw in the news?  Is it a person I encountered that seemed to dismiss me?  Is it how I look?

What is it?

I cannot answer these questions for you.  Your experience is yours.

I can breathe into my own experience and make space for all the stories, events and ideas that crash against my soul keeping it weighed down in fear.

I used to rail against this weight.  I am learning to welcome it.

What if it has more to teach me than easy joy?

With this understanding, my burden lightens ever so and my hope grows steady.

Hope is not peace itself, but it is a beginning.

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Choices

Every day life presents us with a choice.  But first, we have to acknowledge this choice exists.  This realization could happen in an instant or take years of dismantling our beliefs.

Either way, the choice exists and when we are ready, we must select the one that fits us best.

This is simple but our minds may not be ready to see it as so.

I finally see the choices clearly.  One has me part of the world, fighting each day for peace in my heart.  The other holds the stairs that will transcend me beyond the world.  If I remain in the fight, it will appear I am not alone.  If I choose the stairs, it will appear I am completely alone.

The choices are real, but the assumptions I have about them are false.

The stairs hold True Connection.  The world holds everything else.

Either choice does not fit me.

Both break my heart in different ways.

I am not ready to choose.

I am adrift in my indecision.

All I am ready to do is honor my confusion.

So, I sit at this bend in my spiritual road and rest for a while.

All decisions in the world symbolically reflect exactly where I am.  If you are tired and you are confused, come and rest with me for a while.

We will wait here together.

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