I am having the hardest time writing lately. There is something going on within me, way below the surface, that is cutting me off from my creative source. It seems the harder I try to write or ‘get my work out there’, the more it falls flat. It’s hard to be motivated to write if it feels like no one is really listening.
I am learning that my personal goals include being a writer that ‘matters’. Life is showing me that personal goals often go unmet. The chasm that is left behind is the foundation for spiritual goals.
What exactly are spiritual goals?
Letting go of personal ones.
That’s it. That’s all. Nothing more, nothing less.
Here is something I wrote with a personal goal of dramatically affecting the lives of many. Truth is, probably only one or two dear friend will read this. My husband will, too. He’s good like that.
If my soul could speak, this is what it would say to you….
I hope you enjoy.
The Window to Our Souls: Creating a Well-Loved Life
When we come into this world our hearts are clear. Our personal souls are like pristine windows that are so spotless, they almost are invisible. This is ideal. This is how all our love and light can safely escape into the world. The world thrives on our light. Thus, our purpose is fulfilled simply by expressing what we are…Love.
As we move through the world, something happens to our clear-soul-glass. It starts to crack when our love isn’t recognized by another. When another person is incapable of holding our light, we start to question everything. Is there something wrong with my soul? Why doesn’t this person see how much I love them? Does this mean I am no longer valuable? Am I already broken?
Even if we try to fight it, the cracks are formed. They wrench their way through our sensitive soul-glass. Sometimes, if we get very quiet, we can hear the straining creaks as they cut their way through our heart. To escape the pain of rejection we become so alone in our thoughts the glass has no choice…it shatters.
What is the secret to mending a shattered soul? First, you have to be brave enough to let go of your expectations of others. You can no longer rely on another person to make you whole. This is the scary part. The letting go. It feels like no one will catch you. That’s the idea. No one will. You have to catch yourself.
If you made it this far and let go of your expectations of others, you are ready for the second step. This is the part that is not scary. This is the part that you get to be whoever you want. You do so with reckless abandon because IT NO LONGER MATTERS WHAT ANYONE ELSE THINKS!
YOU determine your worth. YOU determine your value. YOU create a life worthy of all the glorious beauty-love your soul has to offer.
So, what next? You might grab a broom and a dustpan. It makes sense to sweep up your soul parts and see what might begin to form. As you sweep, you might come across some forgotten pieces. Wait a minute! You love to draw? Well then, why don’t you? Remember, there’s no more fear here. You love something, you do it, no questions asked. And, how about that? You think bird watching is divine? Me, too! It’s crazy that so few seem to understand the holy nature of being wholly in nature. See? It’s awesome being you! You get it. You understand you are very close to rocking this life.
By now you may feel excited, uplifted and more than a little bit healed. You look at your amazing configuration of soul parts gathered in a transcendent pile. Since fear no longer lives here, you start grabbing pieces. You have no plan and that’s part of the divinity of it. You are going on faith. Your arms and hands are flying as you begin to lay the pieces down. You work like this a long time. You are so firmly steeped in the joy of the process, you don’t even notice when you are finished.
You step back. It takes a moment for you to acclimate to the giant wonder of what you are seeing. All your forgotten parts take up more space than you could have possibly imagined. Eventually, you have a good vantage point to finally see the whole of it.
Your jaw drops.
Yep, your soul is jaw-dropping.
You have made a filigreed wonder of the richest, deepest, truest stained glass window one could ever create. Your soul is so stunning it almost hurts to look at it. That’s what you’ve been hiding from yourself this whole time!
As your light reawakens and begins to once again spill forth unto the world, it is more sublime than ever. Here’s the best part, the love you give is even deeper, broader and wider now that you understand what it means to have risen up from the ashes. You were never actually broken, you were simply on your way to owning your brilliance.
I’m glad you made it back to yourself. I’m glad you put your soul back together. It makes it easier for me to do the work to make mine whole again, too. You truly are a trailblazer.
Thank you for making the world so beautiful.