I started on the inward path as a means to change my external world. I tried desperately to translate the Truth of My Soul onto the world. I didn’t understand how I could be aware of Everlasting Peace within me and not have it show up outside of me. Turns out, I had the prayer equation backwards. I thought that changing the outside is what allowed me to be at Peace. Only this isn’t so. Peace is now regardless of what my life looks like.
This concept of ‘righting the inside’ to get the world I wanted eluded me for a long, long time. It’s hard to let go and connect to the Love Within when your world is full of anxiety, darkness and despair.
As I have learned to embrace the process of going within, I am less angry that my life isn’t what I want it to be. This is because there is a Love so Beautiful within me that when I connect to it, the world pales in comparison.
When I sit with this Beauty I am transcendent and so very Loved. I not only have Joy, I am Joy. I know all is well and that everyone has equal access to this inheritance of Everlasting Love.
Then, I come back to the world and survey the landscape of my life. It doesn’t look any different and I still hurt deeply.
There is a lining of hope that colors my soul now. Within my heart a wisdom has taken root and it comforts me.
My world isn’t changing.
Only how I am in the world has changed.